You’re on the last leg of the 1994 Dave Coulier Triathlon, and your arch-rival, Stuntz McKenzie is hot on your tail. As you round the corner, you notice a ledge. A potential shortcut? You weigh your options and find that the only logical solution is to jump. With so much on the line, you take a deep breath before realizing that something is off. A shadow looms over the race, as the voice of former triathlon legend, Jimmy Thundercalves echoes through the clouds. “The victory you seek is not what you think. The victory is within yourself”. Jimmy’s right. A victory from cheating is not a victory at all, and as you come to a screeching halt, Stuntz McKenzie flies by you on a ten-speed, clinching first place and the trophy that comes with it. But that’s okay, cuz second place gets a sweet 100% combed, ring-spun cotton crew neck t-shirt, with double-needle sleeves and bottom hem. Unfortunately for you though, when you came to a stop, 4 other bikers flew by you, including the ghost of Jimmy Thundercalves, putting you in sixth place. No worries though, cuz we have plenty of shirts in stock.
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